


Anything goes

by Nanerich



Category: Captain America - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Anti-Memes, Back to the forties, F/M, Gen, Homesickness, Mario Kart, or maybe not
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-23
Updated: 2019-12-23
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:15:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21917422
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nanerich/pseuds/Nanerich
Summary: Steve starts an all-out war against memes in the Avengers compound. Which is nothing personal against Peter. But all this new 21wst century crap... you can't blame a guy for being homesick.
Relationships: Peggy Carter/Steve Rogers
Comments: 2
Kudos: 12





	Anything goes

“You do not stand even the slightest chance!“

“Oh yeah? Well, lemme see about that...“

“You spiders are nothing compared to Hawkeye!“, Clint exclaimed. “Eat my dust, Spiderchild!“ With that he overtook Peter, almost pushing him of the couch and his cart of the tracks.

“Asshole“, Peter grumbled and got both his balance and his Princess-Peach-Cart back on track.

“Pete! Language!“

“Don't worry, Natasha, Mr. Stark is in the lab. And I have an agreement with FRIDAY not to rat me out anymore.“

“Good for you, kid. Though swearing is not going to get you back in the lead, LOSER-Man!“

“Clint, chill, before the kid webs your controller to the ceiling again...“

She loved to hang out with the two; 'double-babysitting' as Stark called it. Especially their Mario-Cart-Tournaments, which could get rather intense. After one particularly bad incident, Stark banned all arrows, webshooters, hammers, shields and nunchucks from the gaming room and grounded everybody for two weeks. Loki still wasn't allowed back in, and Bucky had yet to pay for screen he punched. He wasn't planning on paying anything back, he just hoped Stark would eventually forget about it.

Last round. Clint was still in the lead, with Peter and Natasha almost on him.

“HA! Take that! Imma blue shell your ass in 3...2...1...“

“Don't you fucking dare, Peter!“

But it was too late. With a smug “BAM!“ Pete overtook Clint's crashed Yoshi and crossed the finish line, followed only moments later by Natasha's Toad. (After a – separate – incident, Mario and Luigi were banned from consideration. Well, Tony reprogrammed the entire game and everyone who chose one of them would immediately get kicked out. Steve tried it once; it didn't go well.)

“Fuck yeah, in your face, bitch!“

“PETER BENJAMIN PARKER!“

He jumped up, startled and shocked, almost tossing over the couch with her and Clint still on it. Damn, sometimes she really forgot how strong that kid was.

“Mr. Stark, I'm.. oh, I'm so sorry, I can explain...“

“Shut it. NOW.“

Natasha couldn't decide what was funnier: Peter's face, all shocked and embarrassed to have been caught by his mentor; the mix of anger and confusion on Stark's face, who couldn't believe his Spiderson knew these words; or Clint, who was close to crying for losing so close to the finish line. Needless to say, he wasn't the most gracious loser.

“Stark, relax“, she said.

“Really Mr. Stark, I am so sorry, it just came out, I will never ever...“

“Shush.“ Tony held his hand up. „We will talk about this later. All of us“, he added with a stern stare.

“Yes, Mr. Stark“, they answered in unison. Pete fell back on the sofa, his face still as red as his spidey-suit.

“Now the bigger issue: who the hell is playing „Anything Goes“ on repeat? That damn song is stuck in my head and I can't concentrate. I will not be mad, just tell me who.“

The trio listened for a moment. They were so focused on their game, they never even realized.

“I'm sure it's Barker“, Clint said.

“Barker?“

“No, it's not me. My music priviledge was taken away after last week's 'High School Musical' marathon.“

“Sorry Stark, then it's not us.“ Clint shrugged and turned his attention back to the screen.

“Excuse me. Barker?“ ,Tony repeated, louder this time, looking quite confused.

“Oh yeah, funny story. So, Clint found this meme 'Avengers as dogs”.“

“It's pretty cute, I'll show you later.“

“The problem is that there was no Spider-Man.“

“What?“ Wow, Tony looked almost as hurt as Peter had. “How can they leave out the second most important Avenger?“

“That's what we thought as well. So we made up our own meme. Meet Peter BARKer, Clint BARKton and Ms. Natasha RomaRUFF!“ The boy in their middle beamed almost like the first time they met.

Before he could voice his excitement, he was interrupted by a pretty angry voice at the door. “And that's why I'm protesting!“

She looked up and saw a rather mad-looking Captain America, holding a 'BAN MEMES' Sign.

“Wait, you're blaring Sutton Foster on max?“

“Yes. I find this song perfectly captures my feelings: Nowadays everything goes. Literally Everything. Unfunny jokes no one understands have been flooding the mansion, and so have those weird videos and that horrible modern music. Which, quite frankly, isn't music. I'm not saying that things need to be like in the 40's, but life is getting extremely difficult and frustrating. And that's why we are protesting!“

“Keep me out of this!“ Only now Natasha saw Bucky behind Steve, looking apologetic. “Come on, Steve, Pete's slang and popculture lessons are helping the both of us. And besides: you do like One Direction...“

“Wow.“

Steve turned beet-red, turned to Bucky, scoffed what sounded to her like “Et tu, Buck!“, before turning around and stomping off.

“Damn, what's gotten into him?“, Clint asked, though more to the screen than anyone else.

“I'm sorry“, Peter mumbled. The grin on his face was gone; he looked at the floor and... was that a tear?

“Pete...“ Before Natasha could really react, Stark was kneeling in front of the couch. “Hey kid, what are you sorry for?“

“That Mr. Rogers is mad, because of my memes... and the vines... and my music... I'm sorry, I'm so annoying.“

It was dead silent for a moment before Tony put his hand on the Spiderlings shoulder. “Pete, look at me.“ Natasha never knew, Mr. Man-of-Iron-I-don't-have-Emotions could be that soft with anyone. “I can say with 100% certainty that all of our lives are so much better because you're a part of it!“

“Definitively!“, Clint chimed in.

“We arachnids stick together, through anything and everything, right?“

Peter tried to smile, but he still looked like a kicked puppy. It broke Natasha's heart and she could tell, the others felt the same. She put her arm around his shoulder, and he sunk against her, burying his face in the nook of her neck.

“Barnes. Explanation. Now.“

With Stark's angry voice, everyone turned his attention to the Winter Soldier. Well, almost everyone. Natasha kept the Spiderling in her sight, softly stroking his arm. Poor boy. He always took things so personally. And being told of by one of his personal heroes?

“That reason better be good, or I'll march straight over there and blast his ass back to 1941.“

“That's actually the problem. Today is the anniversary of him joining the military and meeting a certain Ms. Peggy Carter. He's homesick.“

Bucky walked over to the couch. “Trust me, Peter, it has absolutely nothing to do with you. Steve totally adores you and – even if he doesn't like to admit it – but his meme game is getting pretty strong.“

The kid smiled. “Yeah, when Pepper gives Mr. Stark a kiss, he yells out 'right in front of my salad!'“

Tony looked only a little disappointed, his Spiderson called Pepper by her first name, but he was still Mr. Stark...

“You know, he once send me the galaxy brain one. Oh, and this is totally secret”, Bucky leaned closer “he is actually hoping for a vine revival to make an answer to 've shot him in ze legs!'“

“Really?“

“Totally.“

Peter giggled. Tony nodded a silent thank you, though he was still visibly pissed at Steve.

“Now, what do we do about Rogers?“

Pete looked up, the big grin back on his face. “I might have an idea.“

  
  


* * *

  
  


It took everything Steve had not o cry. He carefully fondled he compass with Peggy's picture in it. The last few days were rough, but today everything just boiled over. All the memories of his first day in the military, how – even though his pre-serum-self barely got through the drills – he had this time in best memories.

And Peggy... oh Peggy. What they had... In all honesty you could barely call it a courtship. But their connection was real. And if he didn't have to crash that plane... He could have grown old with her, instead of having to say goodbye on her deathbed. Life back then was just so much easier.

Wait... was that Nat King Cole playing? He couldn't remember the title, but yeah, he definitively remembered dancing to that all that time ago…

“FRIDAY, who is playing that?“

“It is Peter. He is waiting for you in the living room.“

“Why?“

The way he just yelled at everyone, he couldn't believe anybody would want to see him right now. And who said he wanted to see any of them?

“I am not at liberty to say“, the AI answered.

Great. “Fine. Just tell me if I have to deal with an angry Stark, blasting me for yelling at his Spiderkid.“

“You have nothing to fear.“

He took a deep breath. “Alright. Tell them I'm on my way.“

Slowly he headed to the living room. Why couldn't they leave him be and let him wallow in self-pity? Sure, Bucky understood what he was going through. Hell, he had it worse, being tortured and turned into a killing machine. And everyone – even Stark – had finally come round and supporting and accepting him for what he used to be and what he turned into. Steve only felt that in all that commotion they kinda forgot he was going through some shit too. And Buck was always better than him at 'fitting in' – though it was weird to say that about a brainwashed assassin _... Stop it, Rogers, you're spiralling!_

He took another deep breath and opened the door – and couldn't believe his eyes. Bucky was wearing his old uniform. Peter could have won any Frank Sinatra look-alike-contest, with Stark and Clint as follow-ups. And Natasha – he couldn't believe his eyes. She had done her hair up and was wearing a flowery flirt-dress. All of them looked like they were straight out of a history book.

“What the...“

“There you are!“ Bucky handed him a glass of punch.

“Looking good, Sergeant Barnes. But what the hell is this?“

“It's a 40's style party. To make you feel a bit more like home, Mr. America.“ Peter walked up to him. “I'm sorry I was so pushy and annoying about the whole popculture thing.“

Oh this kid was truly precious. “Pete, you have nothing to be sorry for! I am the one who is sorry, for letting all my moods and emotions out on you. Without you, I'd be really lost. And Bucky too!“

“So, we're continuing meme classes tomorrow?“, Peter asked, looking expectantly between Steve and Bucky.

“Yeah, I'd like that.”

“Perfect! Then let me show you around! So, Mr., sorry., Sergeant Barnes told us everything we needed to know about the 40's. The outfits“; as if on cue, Clint tipped his hat; “the swing music“; Bucky spun Natasha around; “and he also told us about the food. But that sounded really disgusting, so we got Pizza instead. Seriously, all that boiled cabbagge... Sorry, I'm getting of track. Anyways, I really hope you like it!“

Steve couldn't hold the tears back anymore. “Peter, it's absolutely perfect!“ He pulled him and hugged him as tightly as he could. “Thanks kid. You really are the best!“


End file.
